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Damn,” Will muttered. “You know, I hate you sometimes, Dave. Bet you could be in her pants in three seconds if you wanted.”Dave shrugged, put on an exaggerated expression of confidence, and said, “What can I say?”“Asshole,” Will chuckled.Then Carl asked, “Do you know who that is?”Dave and Will both shook their heads.“That’s Amy Farber’s daughter, Caitlin,” Carl explained.In an instant, the nagging sense of recognition that had struck Dave the moment she walked over to the table made sense.“Oh, shit,” Will said. “Amy Farber. You banged her and her mom.”It was the incident that had forever cemented Dave’s reputation as the biggest player in town, all those years ago. He had dated Amy for a couple of months, and they’d gotten into an argument over something he couldn’t remember, resulting in her breaking up with him. That night, he’d happened upon her hot mom exiting a bar, and one thing had led to another.Amy had shown up at his place to apologize just as her mother was leaving with an. * Put the Florida alligators in the moat along the Mexican border.Any other problems you would like for me to solve today? Yes!Think about this: 1. Cows 2. The Constitution 3. The Ten CommandmentsCOWS Is it just me, or does anyone else find it amazing that during the mad cow epidemic our government could track a single cow, born in Canada almost three years ago, right to the stall where she slept in the state of Washington? And, they tracked her calves to their stalls. But they are unable to locate 12 million illegal aliens wandering around our country. Maybe we should give each of them a cow.THE CONSTITUTION They keep talking about drafting a Constitution for Iraq ... Why don’t we just give them ours? It was written by a lot of really smart guys, it has worked for over 200 years, and we’re not using it anymore.THE 10 COMMANDMENTS The real reason that we can’t have the Ten Commandments posted in a courthouse is this -- you cannot post ‘Thou Shalt Not Steal’ ‘Thou Shalt Not Commit.
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